The end of wanton mornings, and hopelessly over-longed for evenings.. of weird new house parties, and truck driver's hangouts. Of mothering myself, mothering another, being un-mothered and then mothering some more.
Its going to be a new freedom now. Freedom from negative labour, negative card balances and an overload of carbs. Now for some of that thing they call family life, whatever that is. It's been too long, I've forgotten what it is. Not that I regret not having it much.. but there's a new pining. A pining for a tiny hot meal after 400 hours of ugly airports and over-done hostesses. Of no time to sleep and too much time to read without the power to concentrate. Of too much hard disk space wasted without time to watch. Of a perenially poor larder and walls that insist on growing. I'm over saturated now.. like my bedroom wall.. retaining too much water.
Now it's the time for padding up the wallet, and unpadding the seat of my pants.. of shared nights and also, shared mornings. Of having many things to get away from at the start of the day and returning to chirpiness at the end of it. Look forward, without teteering on thin ice. Unlock the dreams stocked up, let go rather than grasp desperately.
6 years of wantonness.. and now I'm done. Working on life is bloody hard work.. I'm happy to share the load. Now for some of that 'reaping the fruits'.
Oh! To be able to tuck in at night and wait for sleep to come.
3 comments:
Wonderfully written. Loved. Moving out?
i hope the wantonness is something that you can take with you as you move on.. what's the point of anything if you cannot be that?
i love it when laziness seeps through your words and make it something so beautiful and poetic.. i wish you could write more, about lazy things.. i wish you could live in some place which would embrace this delightful wantonness that makes this blog so pretty..
I know this has almost nothing to do with Bandra, but then what are we if we don't digress.. :)
@kanishk: thanks. yes.
@neel: it wasn't meant to be about bandra in the first place.. just the general state i was feeling at that time. im glad you liked the laziness i was half trying to hide :P
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