Glum Greyed Gloomy Grounded

Have you ever watched those 'X-treme' game shows on sports channels? Where there are those Asian (read yellow, small eyed, almost always super rich and always in white tees for some weird reason) uber cool kids that semi sit on super bikes and go up a flight of stairs or down and skate over railings and stuff like that. All of those shows were so ... distant. Cos none of the people who belonged to our immediate lives did anything like that.

Thank god for lazy Indian childhoods playing 'kalla-polis' and chasing old cycle tyres down the road. Where all we did was stuff face with mangoes, fight about who cheated in 'hide-n-seek' and waited till we fell sick so we could get some attention. Well, thats all I did. When I had friends that is.. which most of the time i didn't.. but seeking sympathy is bad.. so no more.

I simply never got how those kids did so many things and they were almost always 2-3 years younger than I was. I felt like I had gotten a raw deal.. I was bored, in an 'uncool' country, with parents who were always too busy or tired, a completely uninspired landscape and absolutely no energy. To add to it, I was born too early. How mean is that? Tops MY list of mean-ness for sure. I mean, there I was, all of 13 with buck teeth and big glasses and I'm being bombarded with images of cool, slick, over achieving, better looking kids who are all younger than I am.

Is this depressing or is this just me? Of course its depressing.. why else would I write about it.. I expect people to sympathise.. no.. wrong word, i meant to say EMpathise.. Rahul Bose says, bloggers are people who want showcase the lives to the world, right? Seek attention. Well, he didn't put it as well, but that was the gist of his comment. Isn't he like so absolutely amazingly bang on right???

Uh.. so.. yea.. I 'happened' at the wrong place and wrong time. Come to think of it, its probably the only constant in my life.. that at any point in time I know exactly what my life is missing.. why else would I remember inane TV shows from 10 years back... There I did it again... reminded myself.

Do you remember the skateboarders? There is this big deep scary looking trough with high walls on either side and they would go up and down and jump off the edges and make cool looking poses.. do you? Isn't life like that? Atleast mine is. Like the weak law of large numbers. I don't know what in f**ks name it actually is.. but it sounded so cool..and so I made one up for myself. Anyway, my interpretation is that no matter what highs and lows you might notice or 'significant' changes, repeat it enough number of times and everything will hover around the average.. like an unspoken word.. a 'weak' law. In simple words, no matter what you try, how hard you work to delude yourself, you will always regress to the average, the middle point of the trough.. and all you are doing is oscillating around it.

You read the title of this post first, didn't you? Yet you continued reading?? Tch Tch :D